Sharing my days with hubby and doing OK.
The Inspector (aka, Hubby) retired last week and, so far, things are going (sort of) fine. It is day three and I have faith (and hope) things will continue this way for at least another week. The actuarial tables, however, tell us that we can live this life of 24/7 togetherness for 25+ more years (which in retirement years, could feel like 50) Hmmm, no one warned me about this before I said, "I do." Trying to be positive, I checked the Internet for some ideas on how we should deal with this new phase of life. Articles suggested that other than the usual route of volunteering, watching grandchildren, going on cruises, or complaining about everything, it is also a good time to start a new career. Now, they say, may be the right time to try out that great idea you had but didn't do because of the responsibilities you had when you were younger. Unfortunately, it might be too late to become a rap artist or acrobat.
The other day, I read in our local paper about an elderly gentleman who was living in an assisted living facility and was still able to become an entrepreneur even at his late stage of life. The rent at the home was subsidized by the county so he had some of his pension money left at the end of the month to invest in a business. Somehow, he was able to leave the premises and walk to a local liquor store. When he returned, he sold drinks to the other residents. With the profit, he hired prostitutes to visit and entertain him in his room. Unfortunately, things came crashing down when one of his ladies was found hiding under his bed. His new career came to a quick halt and he was asked to leave the home. Apparently, he was not as disabled as they thought. I am wondering what his third act will be. Maybe he could start up his own hedge fund as he seems to like risky business.
Well, at least he has his memories, or maybe not.
The Inspector (aka, Hubby) retired last week and, so far, things are going (sort of) fine. It is day three and I have faith (and hope) things will continue this way for at least another week. The actuarial tables, however, tell us that we can live this life of 24/7 togetherness for 25+ more years (which in retirement years, could feel like 50) Hmmm, no one warned me about this before I said, "I do." Trying to be positive, I checked the Internet for some ideas on how we should deal with this new phase of life. Articles suggested that other than the usual route of volunteering, watching grandchildren, going on cruises, or complaining about everything, it is also a good time to start a new career. Now, they say, may be the right time to try out that great idea you had but didn't do because of the responsibilities you had when you were younger. Unfortunately, it might be too late to become a rap artist or acrobat.
The other day, I read in our local paper about an elderly gentleman who was living in an assisted living facility and was still able to become an entrepreneur even at his late stage of life. The rent at the home was subsidized by the county so he had some of his pension money left at the end of the month to invest in a business. Somehow, he was able to leave the premises and walk to a local liquor store. When he returned, he sold drinks to the other residents. With the profit, he hired prostitutes to visit and entertain him in his room. Unfortunately, things came crashing down when one of his ladies was found hiding under his bed. His new career came to a quick halt and he was asked to leave the home. Apparently, he was not as disabled as they thought. I am wondering what his third act will be. Maybe he could start up his own hedge fund as he seems to like risky business.
Well, at least he has his memories, or maybe not.
Those prostitutes must be mighty young; I can't remember the last time I could get down that low.
ReplyDeleteOf course she would be young. He probably passed her off as his niece or grand niece.
DeleteOh my gosh!! I am laughing my butt off! Clever little man but his ideas went awry. Sadly. ;-)
ReplyDeleteJane xx
I am sure some of his customers at the home were sad to see him leave. Happy hour will not be as happy.
DeleteArleen, all kinds of things get under beds. I don't see how the old guy can be held responsible for everything down there. I never look under the bed. However, I wish you and spouse all the best in this new phase of retirement life together. It contains a happiness unencumbered by lesser schedules.
ReplyDeleteGeo, that is very true. Many things can get lost under a bed. Naked women have a habit of turning up in unusual places. She was probably looking for her keys.
DeleteThe only profitable, easily run, and not overly time consuming, business I could recommend to your husband is drug dealing. But he'd have to be prepared to drive a Hummer, drape himself in heavy gold chains, and wear his trousers down by his knees. He may not be prepared to make the sacrifice.
ReplyDeleteWell, his belt is riding a little further south these past few years due to repositioning of his body, but he would never, ever drive a Hummer. There is no way he could climb into one.
DeleteShe was left there after the last cleaning session... They never clean under the beds thoroughly enough.
ReplyDeleteI am certain that his services at the home were sadly missed, and wonder whether he has started a trend. The fact that he was getting customers says there is definitely a business opportunity there...
Maybe he could franchise it.
DeleteNeed to be careful always...
ReplyDeleteAt his age, why not take a chance.
DeleteA man's gotta do what a man's gotta do! I'm surprised he didn't try to recruit some investors. I'll bet he'll have a much better business plan at his next residence, if they don't attach an alarm to his bed! Great story, Arleen! Best of luck to you and your hubby.
ReplyDeleteJulie
Julie, I am sure he is a hero to many. This story appeared on Page 3 (above the fold) in our newspaper. I think it deserved Page 1.
ReplyDeleteThat is hysterical!!!! LOVE It! One of our friend's fathers broke his hip in the "assisted living" place when he fell OFF OF another resident and broke his hip. She, however, was unharmed. lol Gotta love it!
ReplyDeleteThanks for your visit and comments, too. xo Diana
That is a much better story he has to tell about his broken hip than the usual one of tripping over the dog or cat.
DeleteWe need more like him in this world! Especially when they get caught and entertain us so charmingly! My husband and I fortunately each have our own study to escape -- he can do his boring stuff and I can be my much more interesting self. We meet from time to time during the day in the kitchen for tea, lunch and sometimes the News -- when I can tolerate the running commentary...
ReplyDeleteIt was the best news story I read last week. I love that he had not given up on life and was still in the game.
DeleteIt sounds like you have found a way to cope with togetherness. I am glad we are starting this new phase in the spring. We have the whole outside to find some extra space.
Sounds like that old dude still had a lot going on. (Maybe he was a gangster in his youth?) Still, he gets points for his ingenuity. And for making us all laugh.
ReplyDeleteAs for your hubby being newly retired, congratulations! My hubby retired thirteen years ago, and we're still loving it. We do a lot of things together, but we also maintain our own separate interests and space, too. (No need to be joined at the hip ALL the time!)
I retired three years ago and it took me awhile to adjust. Now I hope to help him, but that will be harder. After thirteen years, I pray that we will do as well as you, Susan.
DeleteYour town may be small, but it sure has some old swingers in it! Haha! I have indeed heard that cruises and complaining is de rigeur for retirees. You can also adopt a lot more cats, and your husband can practice standing outside, shaking a cane, and yelling at the kids to stay off the lawn. ;)
ReplyDeleteWhat is admirable about the old coot is that he had a plan. I am hoping my hubby gets one also, albeit, one that is G rated and won't make the papers.
DeletePerhaps not quite the new career you had in mind! My elevator is also going down, but has shot past plumbing supplies and unexpectedly stopped at the weddings floor!
ReplyDeleteCongratulations, Marianne, and much happiness to you both.
DeleteHow funny! That old man was really thinking there, unfortunately all illegal. Now he has to spend the rest of his retirement in jail or pay hefty fine. Not sure what the punishment is for that sort of thing. As for you and your hubby, I'm sure there's a better plan that will present itself!
ReplyDeleteWell, I don't think he went to jail, at least I hope not. He did get thrown out of the home and it might have been difficult for his family to find someplace else that would accept him. I am sure though that the staff at the facility never had a client like him and will talk about it for years.
ReplyDeleteHi Arleen,
ReplyDeleteSuch hilarity. That dude has almost become my latest hero.
All the best to your hubby in his retirement and to you noting your husband's possible new entrepreneurial skills. He does read your posts, right...
Gary :)
He did wrong, Gary, but there could not be anyone who would condem him -except the bureaucrats who through him out of the home.
DeleteHA! This made me lol. I'd love to be like that old man when I get to be his age.
ReplyDeleteDon' we all?
DeleteHm, not sure I'd like that kind of old gentleman living with me. But it was a bit spoilsport of them to evict him from the home !
ReplyDeleteI think they had to evict him as he was carrying on on the county's dime.
DeleteLol......i like him..he sounds a right one....i want to be like that
ReplyDeleteWe all secretly admire bad boys.
DeleteVery hilarious post. I enjoyed it.
ReplyDeleteAny business undertaking has a risk and unfortunately this man's business failed. At least he tried instead of sitting and sulking and perhaps ogling at women.
After retirement, it is good to be busy because time hangs heavily on hand and life appears to be directionless.
Very humorous post.
Best wishes
Well, I think he was ogling women. Sometimes sweet old man is not a sweet old man
ReplyDeleteGreat post. I spent today at a seminar on becoming a publisher of my own work. I'm intrigued, even as I'm overwhelmed at all I have to do to make it happen. I like the thought of "never too old."
ReplyDeleteLovely post. I don't believe in retirement. I'll keep on working til I just can't get out of bed. There's always so much out there waiting to be discovered, even if we don't get paid for it!! Enjoy your next 50 years lol!
ReplyDeleteDenise :-)
My IWSG post on Mindfulness
This is so inspiring. And I totally agree.
ReplyDeleteWhat a fun post. I hope your husband can find a more legitimate business if he so wishes. Your picture of the cat in the tree is stunning.
ReplyDeleteOh goodness, what a hilarious story but especially your closing comment. Risky business indeed!
ReplyDeleteSorry I am so late, but I’m glad I came anyway. You gave me a good laugh.
ReplyDeleteHope things are going swimmingly and retirement proves to be fun.
I'm sorry for the delay in responding, Arleen...I missed this post. Around the time you wrote it I was unable to connect to the Net for three days...I know I've had time since it's been fixed up, and I really don't know why I've not popped in until now. I don't know where the weeks go.
ReplyDeleteI hope you're not looking under your beds! lol
I'm sure we can all put our thinking caps on and become very enterprising...something will pop up! ;)
I only have my two furry rascals and myself to worry about now that I longer work...and they keep giving me quizzical looks that I try to ignore!
You've got my cat in that tree !
ReplyDeleteAnd here I thought she was one of a kind.
DeleteI have pet projects---- the new hospital, hospice, and the new firehouse we dream of---- I volunteer as publicity coordinator when they hold fundraisers. I like that because there's an END. When my husband was alive and retired, he thoroughly enjoyed the computer, everything about, and nothing phased him. In fact, he readily accepted the challenge. Best part of his day was when I would come home from a meeting all fired up, asking him, "Do you think you could design a flyer for us? This is the theme, the date, the location, the cost. We need it tomorrow." I miss him terribly.
ReplyDeleteIt's been a while now and I hope you have made a good adjustment to this new phase of your life. Just enjoy and be happy that you can be together and maybe even explore new things to do together.
ReplyDeleteHmm...well, I guess everyone has to have a dream. That gentleman's dream went a little too far, though!
ReplyDeleteCute post!! My husband is planning on retiring this December. Thanks for the insight!!
ReplyDeleteHugs,
Jody
Before he retires, make sure he has a plan for how he wants to spend his new-found time. If he doesn't have a hobby or a purpose, it can be a difficult adjustment.
DeleteWell, I could say "that boy might do well" but I won't! :)
ReplyDelete