Friday, May 25, 2012

Sign, Sign, Everywhere a Sign

Wow, May flew by like the wind, but I am doing OK.

Because I have lost weight this year, I have had to purchase some new clothes.  I no longer really enjoy shopping like I once did, as running around stores to buy things to add to my collection of "stuff", is no longer a priority.  I already have too much "stuff" which I am trying to give away, and adding to it defeats my purpose.  However, right now my pants hang on me like a hip-hop teenage boy, and believe me, it is not a pretty sight.  I have to bend down quite a bit doing my gardening and the moon shot that I give off could send small children screaming to their mother's side.

So now I am down to a size with a single digit, a feat I thought I would never experience again.  This does make me feel quite good, however, the parts that used to fit into this size, are no longer in the same places.  Because of this, "separates" are the name of the game and structured underwear is a necessity

Now I am feeling very fashionable in my straight leg pants (not to be confused with skinny).  At first I got some cool boots with heels to wear with this very popular style, only to realize this was a form of suicide for women of a certain age.  I have settled on wedge heels which, so far, have kept me vertical.

As my friends can tell you though, my foray into new hip clothes has not been without incident.  It seems that manufacturers like to put cellophane labels on their apparel.  Aren't the two or three tags that they attach enough?  These labels usually go up the side of the leg of jeans and on left side of the chest  on tops.  I don't always notice them as they are clear except for the size printed on them.  I have now been told by complete strangers that I have forgotten to remove these.  Last week I was out having dinner with friends and I saw someone take a quick glance at the shirt I was wearing, and I knew right away, something was amiss.  No one stares at a mature woman's anatomy, unless of course, they are sickos.   I looked down and there it was, a large M circling my now lifted mams (with the help of my erector set like new undergarments).  It could have been worse, it could have said XXXL.

I can't say this is all new to me.  Back in my perkier days, I used to do my shopping during my lunch hour. Once I went into a store looking for a sweater for my son and bent over a display where they had their merchandise stacked on pyramid-like shelving.  Not finding anything, I left the store and then walked around the mall for another half hour.  Upon returning to work, I walked into my boss' office to give him some paperwork and noticed a  look on his face.  "Arleen", he said, "you have something on your dress", and he made this hand gesture across his chest.  I looked down and sticking to my clothes was a sign saying "50% off".  It must have become attached to me as I leaned over the array of sweaters.

For half an hour I walked around a crowded shopping center with this advertisement.  After thinking it over though, I was not sure to be embarrassed or insulted.  Gee, 50% off and no takers.

27 comments:

  1. How terrible to be discounted in public lol. But how GREAT to have lost weight. Woohoo.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Discounted is one thing, but being left on the shelf even after a discount, is depressing.

      Delete
  2. Hello Arleen:
    We have laughed at the 50% off, and even more so at your comment based on it!! But, whatever, many congratulations on losing weight which obviously you wished to do and we do hope that you will have enormous pleasure from your new clothes, whatever size they are!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I am now discounted to 80 percent off ( well, probably 85 percent).

      Delete
  3. Hahahah!!! We'll never discount you Arleen. :) Congrats on the size 9 accomplishment, that's fabulous!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's an 8, Laura. However, I shop where the sizes are larger than what they say.

      Delete
  4. I know someone that won't wear any new clothing without washing them first. I guess that would be a good way to get rid of those pesky tags!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I only thought you had to do that to underwear and baby clothes. If I buy it, I wear it.

      Delete
  5. Shopping annoys me so I just make sure I have one good pair of "Stacy London approved" jeans on hand to wear with a good jacket. Take it or leave it. It makes me the eccentric old lady at meetings, and that's better than shopping.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Haha! Fifty percent off ! That made me laugh.

    I am impressed at your dieting efforts and hope you troeoughly enjoy your new look!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Congratulations on the weight loss and I, also, enjoyed the 50% off tale.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Your header picture is beautiful! I have to say I almost choked when I read 50% off story. I once loved shopping and now....only if I must. Have you ever washed and dried clothes with the clear size label still adhered? Not good! I hope you have a good weekend.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Glad you enjoyed my humiliation. However, I think if you can get a good story out of an incident, it is worth it.

      Delete
    2. Thank you on your comment on my header picture. I took it the other day at a local arboretum and thought it turned out well. However, pictures of nature are always a winner.

      Delete
  9. Hilarious! You tell THE best stories! Congrats on your weight loss (me too - yea for us!!) I love buying new clothes -- you will too later on I'm betting. Cant even begin to tell you how many bags Ive carted off to the Goodwill stores!

    Keep up the good work! I'm so proud of YOU!

    Vicki

    ReplyDelete
  10. Congratulations on your successful loss! I have also walked around with those darn clear labels affixed to the back of my leg! I was a little mortified to discover it when I was putting them in the wash, after wearing them all darn day!

    You had me laughing about the 50% off! You had no takers because they all believed it was just too good to be true!

    ReplyDelete
  11. Wow. Congratulations. And congratulations also on your new header. Simply beautiful.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Dear Arleen, do you mind telling us how you lost weight. I keep trying, but so far no luck. My brother has lost 25 of the 40 pounds he wants to lose. He tells me "to keep my eye on the prize" and I'll be able to resist eating all the time. I try, but clearly the prize of being thinner isn't winning out.

    As to tags on clothes. My first full winter out of the convent--back in January 1968--I had to buy a whole new wardrobe. I bought a lovely, burgundy, jacket and wore it to school the next Monday. As I strolled up and down the aisles, trying to teach religion, one of the students motioned me to lean down so she could whisper in my ear. And here's what I heard, "Miss Ready, the price tag's hanging down on your bottom." That was a moment of real embarrassment. Peace.

    ReplyDelete
  13. I did Weight Watchers online. It is a diet that is reasonable and healthy. When I was hungry, I ate fruit.

    ReplyDelete
  14. 50% off? A bargain at half the price! Congrats on the weight loss!

    ReplyDelete
  15. Hahahahaha! That's hilarious! Classic.

    Single digit? I think I was about three years old the last time I saw that. ;)

    ReplyDelete
  16. Congratulations on the great weight loss. 50% off doesn't sound too bad depending on your weight to begin with, huh!

    ReplyDelete