Wednesday, October 12, 2011

I'm All That.

I am a superstar and I am doing OK

It might come as a surprise to you, but I don't live my life like the Kardashians', nor do my everyday activities have any resemblance to the ladies from The Housewives of NY, LA, Atlanta or wherever.  No slinky revealing dresses for me, (the world should be thankful for that), no lunch dates in famous restaurants, no fighting with my friends.  My conversation is not spiked with four letter words, although I do have one or two favorites that I like to use on occasion, but I usually save those for hubby.  I can go about town without people mobbing me and photographers taking my picture.  I did not spend four million dollars on weddings for my children, although I think that the baked beans that we served was top shelf.   So whose life is better?

All these ladies wear very tight fitting clothes,  Since they are on TV constantly, they probably have to wear Spanx and can only breathe out every 5 minutes when no one is looking.  I, on the other hand, often dress in lovely, somewhat loose fitting, elastic waist, athletic pants with either a tee or a sweat shirt.  I can do anything in these.  They are perfect for working out in my gardens, walking around my neighborhood, going to the store, and with the right accessories, even going to lunch with  friends.  Of course, for the more formal occasions, I do wear black.  These outfits do not impede the breathing process, I can bend or sit without worrying about a button popping off or hearing the awful sound of a rip coming from a backside seam. 

On the comfort scale - One for me, none for them.
Unlike these ladies with their 10 inch designer high heels, I like to wear my yellow duck shoes. They are for gardening and are so comfy that I have forgotten once or twice that I have them on and have ventured out to a store wearing them.  I love my rubber footwear as they grip the ground well and I have less chance of falling over .  If, by accident I do, and trip someplace in my yard, there will be no trouble finding me as the yellow neon will stand out. 

On the safety scale - One for me, none for them.
These famous for being famous women have over the top make-up that is probably always applied by professionals.  They need to look flawless so they must have an entourage following them around in case they sweat. I have to admit that I do love my creams and potions also.  I have been known to make mid-night calls into QVC to buy the newest anti-ageing face foundations, eyelash builders, contouring blushes and anything else they might be selling that promise me the impossible.  When they are delivered, I find that they don't hide my freckles (which, at my age, are called maturity spots), my short lashes look like I have now attached black widow spiders to my eyes and the blush really did not add contour to my jowls.  I usually put them all away, go back to my cheap drug store make-up and not care if my lipstick rubs off.  I am over a certain age, so I am invisible to most people anyway.

On the "it doesn't matter" scale - One for me, none for them.

So dressed in my comfy pants, gardening duck shoes, and bleeding lipstick, I win!!  My life is not glamorous by any standards, but it fits me just right. 


  1. It's a comfortable life. Personally I live in blue jeans and shirts...same stuff year round...the only thing that changes are my shoes. Still...just once...I would love to look glamorous.

  2. thanks for the laugh....even if it did hurt. I am so there with you! And thank-ful to be so! I had to laugh because I have some darling orange garden shoes and they are seriously the most comfortable shoe I own, so I find myself at the store often in them. I'm sure your ducky ones are the best though! keep on laughing! Linda

  3. Loved this post Arleen. Elasticated waists R us. One for you, one for me and none for them xxx

  4. ps love your new header picture

  5. I've been living in Hippieville for going on 17 years. Jeans or long skirt, shirt or sweater for me. Barefoot often, unless the floor's too cold. ;)

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  7. Sounds like a wonderful, comfortable life. Just love the picture in the pink fluffy slippers

  8. It sounds to me like you are comfortable with who you are. I think that is pretty perfect. I agree, you win hands down. Bonnie

  9. Dear Arleen, I guffawed when I read this line: "I think that the baked beans that we served was top shelf." Oh, your writing reveals such a dry wit that I'm enamored of it. Thank you.

    As to dress and shoes, Arleen, I'm with you--100%. But I haven't worn make-up for twenty-five years. One day I just thought that the red on my lips looked as if I'd been "slashed." And then and there I gave it all up.

    Fine for me, but I'm not sure that the people looking at me like me make-up-free!


  10. Well, I think you are my kind of pal. I gave up on make up, when my eye lashes started falling out and my eye brows disappeared. Somehow I don't think they should be accentuated!

    Very funny and I totally agree, elastic is so comfy.

  11. Thanks for the laughs - I love this post!!! Especially the neon yellow duck shoes. I always worry if I ever fall no one would find me. Well, maybe my dog would. He'd never get fed otherwise.
    And I can go without makeup but have to have my lipstick!